The One Question Doctors Don’t Seem to Ask

My son has had this persistent cough for about a year now that seems to get worse whenever he comes back from staying the weekend at his grandparents.  I’ve made several conclusions on its causes from maybe he gets exposed to more cooties there, to maybe he just gets too worn out playing that his immune system gets taxed.  His doctor diagnosed his coughs as allergies and prescribed an over the counter allergy medication.  It worked for a while, and then it stopped working.  So I decided to have him see an allergy doctor to see what he was reacting to.  They did some tests on him, to which he came out negative for all environmental allergens.  They said he might be just mildly allergic to mold.  Yet they sent him home with a bag full of medication with complicated directions for administering.  After discussing this issue with other moms, the question about food allergies came up.  The allergy doctor never even got into this.  I looked up food allergies and ways to determine what my son might be allergic to.  To make a long story short, after careful observation, I’m suspecting he’s allergic to dairy. It’s been a few days since he’s had cheese.  So far so good, hardly any coughing at all.

Two weeks after his appointment with the allergy doctor, I got a letter from them stating the results of his allergy tests and that he’s a good candidate for allergy shots.  Allergy shots???  He was only mildly allergic to one out of the 20 environmental allergens and they’re recommending allergy shots???  When I did the same test about 2 years ago, I came up allergic to everything except dogs, and all I got was a nasal spray (which I never used).  I had my other son undergo the same test, with the same results and just got the letter from the allergy doctor.  I didn’t even bother opening it.

I truly believe the cause of a lot of what makes us sick is the food we eat.  Yet doctors never seem to ask their patients what they eat.  They just slap them with a prescription to take care of the symptoms they’re having.  Got diabetes?  Here’s 523 types of pills you need to take 73 times a day.  Have high cholesterol?  Add 53 more pills to that.  Afraid of cancer or the swine flu?  Here’s an untested vaccine that MIGHT prevent it.  In the meantime, go on with your merry lives eating burgers, soda and hot fudge sundaes.   They might tell you what not to eat if your case is really bad, and they might ask you what you had for lunch.  But they never ask you what you eat on a day to day basis.  Knowing what you’ve been eating for the last week or two will give a pretty good indication of what’s causing your symptoms.  Relying solely on prescription medicine to alleviate health problems is like constantly buying more expensive shoes while walking on broken glass.  Save your money and get off the broken glass!!

Most health problems can be solved by spending more time at the produce section of the grocery store, not at the pharmacy.  All doctors should know this.

Another Reason Why Made in the U.S. Kicks Ass–Insights from China

We get a lot of wholesale inquiries every week from retailers all over the world wanting to carry our products in their online or brick and mortar stores.  For the longest time, the only inquiries we always ignored were the ones that were from China.  Why on earth would someone from China want to buy our products at 6, 8 or even 10 times the cost of what they could spend to make it in their own country?   By the time our diapers reach them, after all the fees and shipping costs are in, they might have to sell our diapers for $30 a piece.  Who can afford that in China when most people only get paid a couple dollars per day (from what I’ve heard)?  We did wonder if they were just trying to get samples to knock off.  But that’s already happening anyway, so that couldn’t be the reason why.  A couple of retailers were really persistent and kept following up on their application even after my husband (who screens all wholesale inquiries) has already politely declined their applications.  Curiosity finally got the best of him, so he decided to ask them lots of questions to get to the root of why they really want to buy our products.  Their answers were far from what we expected at all.

Apparently in China, because of their one-child policy, most babies are really treasured and pampered.  An average middle-class household brings home about $1,200 per month, and approximately 50% of that is spent on the child.  $600 per month to spend on babies is a lot of money even here in the U.S.!  In most cases, there is no rent or mortgage to pay because the family usually lives with the grandparents, who also take care of the child while the parents work.  When asked why they would want to spend 10x the amount buying our products versus buying a similar product that was made in China, they said that most of the educated and wealthy people in China perceived products that were made in the U.S. as being the safest for babies.  None of that lead and melamine-tainted crap that’s been all over the news.  And since they were only having one child anyway, they don’t mind paying top dollar knowing that the product they are using on their child is of the best quality.  With our products being mostly made here in the U.S., it is a very attractive feature for those from China, and a lot of other Asian countries for that matter.

I thought that was really interesting.  I know a lot of moms here in the U.S. are tripping all over the bargain $3-6-made-in-China diapers, that are nothing more than just knock-offs of U.S. brands, that they get to score on Ebay and other places online, when a lot of people in China themselves won’t even touch that stuff to use on their own children.

Why You Shouldn’t Pressure Your Child to Get Good Grades

Grades aren’t everything.  Most parents believe academic excellence will provide more opportunities for their children later in life and guarantee them a brighter future.  But does it really turn out that way?  Looking back now, I don’t feel that any of my academic achievements even really matter.  Not that I had much of them anyway.  In elementary and high school, I wasn’t the smartest kid in class, but I wasn’t the dumbest one either.  I got average grades for the most part.  Even when I gave 100% effort into it, I would be above average at best.  Now my sister?  She could ace tests with her eyes closed.  We both took Trigonometry the same semester in college, and I just could not understand it.  At first I thought maybe her teacher was just better than the one I got, so I sat in on her classes.  But it wasn’t the teacher.  My mind was just not wired to comprehend trigonometry.  At least that’s my excuse ;)  It was like teaching a dog to meow.  The only way I passed the course was because I gave my teacher a pathetic sob story about how my future will be ruined if she didn’t pass me.  Now when it came to other subjects that I particularly liked, I would excel at them almost effortlessly.  I graduated culinary school #1 in my class because I absolutely enjoyed every bit of it.  To this day, I still don’t understand how trigonometry relates to Hotel & Restaurant Administration, which is what I majored in college.

I’m not advocating for lazy students.  Not at all.  I’m all for encouraging kids to learn the stuff that will help them through life, like reading, writing, math, etc.  But children should never be made to feel as though they are less worthy as a person just because they cannot get the grades we want them to or what society deems as exceptional.  Neither should they be compared to their more academically-inclined siblings either.  I know a lot of kids who had miserable childhoods trying to satisfy their parents by getting good grades.  I don’t think any of the top students I know from high school all through college fared that much better or worse than anybody else career-wise.  All that pressure to get high grades was for what??

Children are more inclined to want to learn if we nurture their inherent curiosities without any threats involved.  Let them be who they are and appreciate them for it.  An orange will never grow into an apple tree, no matter how much you water it with apple juice.  Variety is the spice of life.  We need oranges just as much as we need apples, grapes, pineapples, and marshmallows. 

To a Child, Love is Spelled T-I-M-E

I have been busy the last couple of weeks, and will be busy the next few more weeks, trying to prepare for a big trade show in September.  I’ve got new products lined up, prototypes and samples to create, marketing materials to design, and taking care of all the logistical details of exhibiting in a trade show.  In addition, I’m adding a new brand/product line, coordinating production and materials for 3, possibly 4 manufacturing facilities, and trying to get our websites a total makeover.  Most of my days are now spent either in front of the computer or in my sewing room.  I’m always trying to get the baby to sleep, and stay asleep, just so I can finish the list of things I have to do.

This weekend, my husband took our boys fishing for the first time.  They were so excited about the whole thing.  They went and bought their own little fishing rods and tackle boxes.  In between the actual fishing, they dug up worms, stepped on cow shit, got bit by bugs, and picked beans, cucumbers, cabbage and corn from the garden of my husband’s grandfather’s farm.  Despite coming home all dirty, sweaty and missing their naps, which usually makes them highly irritable, they were in good spirits the kept playing with their new fishing rods and tackle boxes, long after they’ve gotten back to civilization.  I didn’t go with them, and stayed in our bug-free, animal-poop-free, air-conditioned world I call our home.

My husband and I try to work hard to provide our family with the best life possible.  But in the midst of everything I’m doing for the business, I always have to remind myself of what really matters for my family and the kids, and the need to slow down once in a while.  This short movie really says it all.

Honor Your Children

Somewhere in the bible, it mentions honoring your father and mother as part of the 10 Commandments.  But have you ever thought about honoring your children as well?  We oftentimes think of babies and children as helpless creatures that are incapable of doing much of anything or thinking for themselves.  As a result, a lot of parents get into the routine of doing everything for their kids.

In our house, as soon as my kids can walk, I started giving them small things to do.  As early as a year old, I taught my boys to put their diapers in the diaper pail after being changed.  They were also taught to pick up their toys.  By 2 yrs old, we try to include them in household chores, like helping put away dishes, or throwing things in the trash can.  By 3, they help set the table for dinner and clear the table after eating.  They are also taught to dress themselves at that age with as little assistance as possible.  At 5 yrs old, my eldest can fold clothes, help put away laundry and clean MY bedroom (yes, MY bedroom).  And my 3.5 yr old can get himself ready by picking his own clothes, putting them and his shoes on without always looking like a clown with mis-matched pieces.  Though I’d like to think that my kids are just really smart, I don’t think that’s really the case.  I think the reason they are able to do what they do at a young age is because we allow them to.

When you honor your parents, you give them the same amount of respect you expect for yourself.  Same thing with kids.  When you try to do everything for your kids, even when they are fully capable of doing it themselves, you are in some way disrespecting their abilities and incapacitating them in the process.  Sometimes, even if a task will take 10 times longer to accomplish letting the kids do it instead of you, it’s still worth giving them the sense of accomplishment being able to do the “big people” stuff.  When you get them used to the feeling that they have something to contribute, they are more likely to oblige to help when you need them to.  Kids have a natural tendency to want to help, and you help honor this tendency by allowing them to do things for you or for themselves.  If you constantly ignore the signs of wanting to do something by themselves or reject their offers to help, they will learn to stop trying.

Honoring your children doesn’t just go as far as making them do chores.  It’s also listening to them.  I mean really listening and being in the moment and absorbing every seemingly-ridiculous detail of the story they’re trying to tell you.  Do you ever roll your eyes whenever your grandparent, or even your own parents tell you a trivial story you’ve heard from them for the 600th time???  Yet you still strive to look, act and sound every bit interested like it’s the first time you’ve ever heard it, just out of respect.  Listening to your kids is the best thing you can do to teach them to listen to you as well.  Where else will they learn it from?  When kids know that they are being heard, they will pull less fits and tantrums.

It’s always tempting to play the “I’m-your-parent-so-do-as-I-say” card.  And sometimes it’s easier to just tell the kids to go play instead of letting them help you fix dinner.  Dressing them up, spoonfeeding them, or picking up their toys after them takes a lot less time and mess than involving them in the process.  But you need to take the time and effort to teach them.  It’s okay to go over and re-sweep the floor your little one has already “cleaned”.  Broken dishes can be replaced, and spilled milk can be wiped off.  But when their spirits are always being crushed, it’s a lot harder to restore a child’s motivation to want to learn and grow.

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